Friendship Therapy:
You’ve probably heard of couples therapy. Maybe even family counseling. But what happens when the relationship that feels like it’s falling apart isn’t romantic, it’s your best friend?
Friendship therapy, also called friendship counseling, is a growing space where two (or more) friends sit down together with a licensed therapist to work through what’s come between them. It’s not about blame. It’s not about picking a winner. It’s about figuring out if this friendship still has a future and if it does, what it needs to get there.
Whether you’ve hit a rough patch, grown apart, or said things you can’t take back, a friendship therapy session can give you something rare: a neutral space where both of you actually feel heard.
Friendship therapy is a form of counseling where platonic friends attend sessions together or individually to address conflict, communication breakdowns, or emotional distance in their relationship.
Think of it as couples therapy, but for friendships. And before you dismiss that comparison, consider this: the skills you need to maintain a deep, lasting friendship are nearly identical to those needed in any close relationship: empathy, communication, conflict resolution, and the willingness to be vulnerable.
A therapist who specializes in friendship counseling helps both people:
You can attend friendship therapy online from the comfort of your home, making it easier than ever to start the process even if you and your friend live in different cities.
Friendships don’t usually break overnight. They wear down slowly, quietly until one day you realize you’re not sure who this person is to you anymore. Here are signs it might be time to explore friendship counseling:
You keep having the same argument. The topics change, but the underlying tension never does. Something is going unaddressed.
One of you feels consistently left out or undervalued. You’re showing up, but it doesn’t feel equal. That imbalance starts to become resentment.
A major life change created distance. A new relationship, a move, a baby, a new job, big changes shift priorities. Friendships that don’t adapt to change can drift.
Trust was broken. Maybe a secret was shared. Maybe something was said behind your back. Betrayal in friendship is real, and it deserves real space to heal.
You’re not sure if you should walk away. You’ve thought about ending the friendship but can’t decide. A therapist can help you gain clarity not tell you what to do, but help you understand what you actually want.
Communication has stopped entirely. You’ve been left to read. You’ve stopped reaching out. The silence has become the relationship.
Any one of these is a valid reason to book a friend therapy session even if it’s just to understand your own feelings better.
We live in a culture that treats romantic relationships as the ultimate measure of emotional closeness. We write songs about breakups. We go to couples therapy. We have entire legal frameworks around marriage.
But research consistently shows that close friendships are equally central to our mental and physical well-being. In 2023, the U.S. Surgeon General issued an advisory on the epidemic of loneliness in America noting that nearly half of Americans reported having three or fewer close friends. Strong friendships don’t just make life more enjoyable; they’re genuinely protective.
Yet most of us were never taught how to maintain them.
When a romantic relationship hits turbulence, therapy feels like an obvious option. When a friendship hits turbulence? We tend to either suffer in silence or simply let it fade. Friendship counseling offers a third option, one that treats the relationship with the seriousness it actually deserves.
As therapist Victoria Kress, PhD, puts it: “Many people might say they’ve grown more through their friendships than their romantic relationships.” And friendships are where many of us first learned or failed to learn how to repair what matters.
If you’ve never attended any kind of therapy before, the idea of sitting down with a therapist alongside your friend can feel strange. Here’s what a typical friendship therapy session looks like:
Initial meeting. Most therapists will start by having both of you share your perspective on why you’re there. What brought you to this moment? What do you each hope to get out of it?
Setting shared goals. The therapist helps both of you identify what a “successful” outcome looks like, whether that’s rebuilding closeness, improving communication, processing a specific conflict, or finding clarity about the friendship’s future.
Unpacking the dynamic. A good therapist will help you see patterns you might not be able to see on your own. Why does this argument keep happening? What does each of you actually need that isn’t being met?
Working through conflict or grief. Sometimes friendship counseling involves working through a specific incident. Other times, it’s processing the grief of a friendship that has changed so much it no longer feels familiar.
Individual sessions (optional). In some cases, a therapist may recommend meeting with each friend separately especially to assess any safety concerns or to give each person private space to reflect.
Friendship therapy online follows the same structure, simply via secure video call. Many people find online sessions more convenient, more comfortable, and just as effective as in-person ones.
People across all ages and backgrounds attend friendship counseling, though it’s most common among younger adults in their 20s and 30s who’ve grown up with a more open attitude toward therapy and mental health.
Common reasons people seek friendship therapy include:
It’s worth noting: you don’t have to come with your friend to benefit. Individual counseling for friendship issues is equally valid and helpful, especially if your friend isn’t ready or willing to participate.
Yes. Online friendship therapy has become widely accessible and is considered equally effective to in-person sessions for most people.
The benefits of choosing friendship therapy online include:
When choosing an online platform for friendship counseling, look for one that uses secure, HIPAA-compliant video technology and therapists with backgrounds in relationship counseling, couples work, or group dynamics.
If you’ve been in individual therapy before, friendship counseling will feel both familiar and different.
What’s the same:
What’s different:
Therapeutic approaches commonly used in friendship counseling include Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) which helps both friends examine and shift distorted thinking patterns about the relationship and Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT), which builds mindfulness and helps people accept the reality of their situation with less resistance.
Getting your friend to agree to friendship counseling can feel harder than getting them to agree to almost anything else. Here’s how to approach it:
Pick the right moment. Don’t bring it up during or immediately after a conflict. Wait until you’re both calm and connected.
Frame it as care, not criticism. “I want to fix us” lands very differently than “you’ve been doing X wrong.” Lead with what the friendship means to you.
Normalize it. Many people still have misconceptions about therapy. Reminding your friend that what you’re doing is essentially just talking with someone skilled at helping people communicate can ease the anxiety.
Don’t pressure or rush. Give them space to think about it. Your friend may need time to process the idea.
Be open to starting alone. If they’re not ready yet, starting individual counseling for your own growth is completely valid and may naturally create space for the friendship to shift.
Friendship therapy is a type of counseling where platonic friends attend sessions together to address conflict, communication breakdowns, distance, or major transitions in their relationship. It can also be done individually to work through friendship-related challenges.
Most friendship counseling sessions are not covered by health insurance, since they don’t typically involve a clinical diagnosis. Costs vary by therapist and location, but most practitioners offer the standard hourly rate which friends can choose to split.
Yes. Online friendship therapy is widely available and just as effective as in-person sessions. It’s particularly useful if you and your friend live in different locations.
No. While joint sessions are the most common format, individual counseling to process friendship issues is equally valuable especially if your friend isn’t ready to participate.
Friendship counseling can address recurring conflict, communication breakdowns, betrayal or trust issues, jealousy, drifting apart due to life changes, toxic dynamics, and friendship breakups.
The best friendships of your life won’t maintain themselves; they ask something of you. The willingness to show up. To say the hard thing. To hear it back without shutting down.
Friendship therapy is for people who care enough about the relationship to do the work. Whether you’re navigating a specific conflict, trying to find your way back to each other, or simply trying to understand what went wrong, a trained therapist can help you get there.
Ready to get started?
Book a friendship therapy session online today. You and your friend deserve that space.
